Saturday, October 20, 2007

Confession Time

Okay this is a hard post but I am hoping that by putting it out here it will help keep me honest. I have posted about this before but never stuck with it. Now I am paying the consequences. My weight during this wait has become out of control. Deep down I knew it but it was just easier not to look at myself and focus instead on any instant gratification I could get. What better way is there then eating crap. I have always been a stress eater albeit starving myself in high school when a boyfriend had broken up with me, or later binge eating when I was stressed. I think we would all agree that there aren't many things out there that are more stressful then our adoption experience. Of course there are bigger and worst things for sure but for me this has been it.

Now hardly anything fits me in my closet and I have found myself on many occasions avoiding events (IE The bloggy bash, weddings, a birthday trip at the beach just to name a few) because I am ashamed of how I look. So finally I have taken control and gone back to weight watchers. I know it works cause I have done it before.

Last Saturday my Mom and I finally went. I weighed for the first time in forever. I didn't look at the scale and told the lady just to write it down and not to tell me. It wasn't til Monday that I was able to get up the nerve to look at the card and see how much I actually weighed. I could not believe it. I weigh one hundred and OH MY GAWD!!!!! That enough will keep me from not cheating for sure! So I went shopping and started that Monday.

I was strict and stuck to the program for 5 days. I was actually excited to weigh in and see what if anything I had accomplished. So today I went back for the second time and weighed in. I am please to announce that I lost 3.6 pounds :0 So I am back on track. No cheating for me and hopefully I will at least be presentable by the time I am in China.

What I like about the WW program is the point system. You can eat what ever you want as long as you stick with your allotted points for the day. There are some new products made by weight watchers out there too. The soup and the ice cream really rock :)

So wish me luck. I know I can do it. I have to for me and for Abby! Gotta be healthy for my girl :)


more cows than people said...

good for you, jenny. often when i finally get back to w/w i am at 200 and oh my God. fortunately I'm hovering 10-15 pounds away from my ideal weight these days, which is still not ideal, but liveable.

you can do it! i believe in you!

Joannah said...

I had a hard time sticking to WW over time, but I think it's the most sensible program out there. If I ever do get pregnant and have to lose some baby fat post-pregnancy, I will definitely join WW again.

I wish you lots of will-power and motivation. May the pounds melt off in the last weeks of your weight for sweet Abby.


Lisa, Doug & Briana said...

I totally gained weight during the wait. Nothing like eating to fill a void - I've been there! I have now lost 20 pounds between going China and being so sick. Good luck with WW. I promise you one thing - once your little one gets home, you will lose weight running around after her!

Lisa said...

Way to go Jenny! You can do it. You've got the great wall to climb in a couple of months. You might even have to be there around Christmas time. I pray you will and that if not you'll at least have your picture of Abby.



Catherine said...

You CAN do it! This wait is tough but you're so close to the end. Getting healthy for Abby and I'm trying to get healthier for Hannah too. Thanks for the soup and ice cream tips. Will check up here and see if they carry those products. Mmmm!

Have a great trip down. :o)

PS - Congrats on your first big drop! Way to go!

Isabella's Mommy & Daddy said...

I am sooo proud of you..
I need to do something.. I feel awful...I am just to lazy..
You will do it..
Hugs girly...

Hanne said...

Good luck on your weightlos, Jenny.
If you don´t achive your ideal weigth before China, you will loose them after you get Abby.
I lost 10 pounds after arriving home with my daughter without dieting at all, so don´t worry.
Go for it, I am sure you will be able to do it!

Hanne from Denmark

Chris & Deb said...

Congratulations on your first week Jenny! I have put on weight with this wait also. I think I will find myself at WW too! Way to go!

Mom of 5 said...

Good for you. I hope that soon you will have Abby home-nothing more motivating than running after a little one. :)

PromiseKeepersDaughter said...

Good for you Jenny, I have to agree that WW was the one program that worked for me too and the best part is the point system, if I knew on Monday I had a function to attend on Saturday I would save extra points for that event. Might have to jump on that wagon too actually.
Congrats on what you have already accomplished! That in itself is motivation!

RoLo said...

Way to Go:) I actually went back to WW yesterday, hadnt been in a while. So I have some work to do as well to get back on track and back to my goal weight. We can do this:)

LIZ said...

Hey, good for you Jenny! I guarantee you will lose more weight once you get Abbey home. I lost about 40 lbs from about 2 months before travel until about 5 months home from China with 10 of those pounds coming off in the period I was in China. But I've noticed over the last month a few pounds creeping back on...I was getting too comfortable and not watching what I ate...need to seriously consider WW also. With just a few pounds back on I can already feel the difference in my energy etc. and I don't like it.

Truly Blessed said...

Good for you. We'll try to keep you honest!

You ready for that referral in the next couple of weeks??? : )

kris said...

I weigh more now than I ever have in my life (can you say divorce, loss of child, loss of mom in 8 months followed by 2 years of binging?). I'm 165 at 5'2"... OUCH, and WW used to work so well. I joined again in August, and in TWO MONTHS lost ONE POUND. (And I was also running a LOT training for another race). Turns out I might be perimenopausal and the leader told me "you might gain no matter what you do" encouraging, right? So, I went off track again and quit. Once I know what my "medical" plan is with my doctor this week (having some issues), then I'll see about joining.

Good luck and congrats on the weight loss so far, that is awesome!!

Donna & Andrew said...

Jenny, First congrats on losing 3.6 pounds, That is awesome. WW is a great program and it works. I luv the points system and it is really easy to live with.

Donna said...

The wait can definitely be stressful, so it's no wonder a lot of us put on the pounds during those long months.

One thing you can pretty much count on is LOSING weight when you get home with Abby! Honestly, most of the time, you forget to eat or even go to the bathroom when you chasing a little one around all day.

But seriously, good luck. You're off to a great start!

Doris & Dan said...

Good for you! I gotta get my butt in gear so I really admire you for doing it. Inspiring me!

Keep smilin!

Shannon said...

You rock, Jenny! Keep it up! WW works pretty well for me, especially when I get out there and walk/exercise. Keep us updated on your svelte self! =)

Liene said...

Congrats on the WW. I did it a long time ago when we lived in Baltimore. Then we moved to the desert of CA and it went out the window.

I've been meaning to get back into it as my in-laws have lost a lot of weight and are now lifers with WW.

I do need to lose about 35 to 40 lbs. I'm not obese, but I am overweight and would look so much better if I weighed less.

Keep up the good work and definitely keep posting about the weight loss. I remember talking about it a lot helped me stick to it too.

Lisa and Tate said...

Good for you! I think WW is a great program...

Carol and Taylor said...

Hi Jenny,

From an overweight, out of shape, single mom in miami, I urge you to not forget about exercising. DON'T BE ME!!!! I didn't heed this advice, had T home 2 months, and promptly threw my back out. 3 herniated discs. I can't tell you how painful (literally and figuratively) it is to wait so long for your baby, then be unable to pick her up for a long period of time.

I'm not saying you have to go nuts with it, but some light exercises to work on the abs and the back muscles are all that's needed at a minimum.

I've just joined a gym and am started back on my diet as well. If I can't stick to it, I'll try WW. Sounds like a good pgm. Thanks for the tip.

Good luck!

Made in China said...

Good for you. Remember that health is more important than weight. Your daughter needs a healthy mommy more than a skinny one!

Elisa, Jarrod, Thomas & Zoe said...

Good luck, you were honest and did something..that's great.
You have also made a really goos really proud of yourself!

Shawnstribe said...

Hi from the UK
i know the off to my slimming class.
We are LID12/08/05
the wait is unberable sometimes
best wishes will say a lil prayer for you.
Keep going and dont give up

Headmeister said...

Girlie, good for you! I know weight issues better than anyone and I know it's hard when you don't feel good about yourself, regardless of your size. Congrats on getting off on the right foot and getting the scale down 3.6 pounds! BTW - I'd give anything to be at your starting