Serious Retail Therapy

I have been so bad lately! I can't help it. I hate not having any idea when I might finally get to see Abby's sweet little face. The rumors are starting again and it is sounding like the next batch of referrals will again only include a couple of days. It's early but still stressful. Usually the rumors seem to start off fairly good then turn pretty grim before leveling out some where in the middle. Last time the rumors seemed to turn bad and just stay there. To make up for past disappointments I have been doing a little shopping again. What better way to lift your spirits then by visiting E-Bay :) I may not be able to expect an eminent referral in my mailbox, but I can look forward to the arrival of won items. Hey it works! At least in the short term.

I absolutely love this dress. It is part of the Gymboree Tea Garden line. I would get it in every size if I could afford to.


Tiffany (Mom of Eliza) turned me on to Baby Nay. They have such pretty patterns. Thank goodness for E-Bay cause I would never be able to afford them in retail.

Target find for only 5 bucks!

Babies r us

It's reversible!

I don't know if Abby will be a paci baby or not but if she is I will be ready!

There has been more damage but I don't want to put my Mom in shock :)

Fun Stuff

My friend Mandy surprised me at work the other day with this neat ladybug stone. I know some of you are not into the ladybug thing in regards to China adoptions but I think it's a fun connection to believe in.



This is the card that came along with it.

I also came home last night after work to a package waiting for me on my stoop. Inside was this note from Melanie and..........

This adorable bib.

Tucked inside the ladybug is a little wash cloth :)

Finally My friend Nancy gave me this journal. I love what she wrote inside it :)

30 months???

This button is so appropriate right now. It was created by Julie, Mother of the beautiful Miss Tess. Her Cafe Press store is linked on her blog if you are interested in checking out this and more of her creations.

Rumor Queen today posted what we all already suspected and knew is an eventual possibility. She has written that a European agency is telling their clients that the wait for a referral from China may reach 30 months. Not a pretty thought to live with. If referrals continue to be issued in just a few day increments then this is actually a very believable rumor though. Please excuse me while I go be sick now.

It Happens again

I'm just sitting here now pondering today's terrible events that occurred at Tech today. I'm angry! Those poor kids. I am watching various kids being interviewed on CNN right now and you can just tell that they are in shock. I can't even begin to imagine what their loved ones went through today. It's just crazy! I feel like no place is safe anymore. This type of thing seems to be happening more and more these day's. It makes you stop and think. How can I guarantee Abby's safety in this world we live in today. Is violence becoming the norm? I see it every day at work in the ICU. When I first graduated nursing school back in 1994 we rarely had a gun shot victim. Now we see them almost weekly. It used to be that when we got one of these patients the area that the incident occurred was in an area you would expect that type of thing to happen. Now these incident's are happening everywhere. The victims seem to be getting younger too. Why are guns so easy to get? Why do so many young people have them? How about all of the young people today who saw this and more then likely other prior similar incidents on T.V. How is this increasingly common occurence shaping their future expectations of our world today? Something needs to change and SOON! How can we stop this? That is the million dollar question. Man, I just really hate guns!

Need a Smile?

I found this link to a smile on the CHI yahoo group. Love Without Boundaries put together this beautiful slide show sure to make you smile. They do wonderful things for so many children. Please go here to check it out. Click on watch to get the show started :)

Congrats Mom and Hugh!

Referral update

Mr Stork arrived this past Friday. Waiting families that were lucky enough to be logged in from October 25 through October 26, 2005 finally had their dreams come true. :) Yep! You read that correctly, only 2 days worth of LID's were issued this month! BUMMER with a capital B :( Why only 2 days you ask???? Only the CCAA knows.................

Happy Easter

We could all use a laugh :)

On a more serious note though........ Happy Easter to each and everyone of you!

16 months today

I can't believe I have been logged in with the CCAA for 16 months! Actually, I can, but what I really can't believe is that I have absolutely no idea how much longer I still have to wait. I would be fibbing if I said I wasn't frustrated. Anyways I celebrated today's important milestone by buying another Willow figurine. I had never seen this one. I think she is perfect and a very appropriate symbol for where I am at this point in my life.

Click on the card to enlarge it and you will see what I mean. (I'm sorry that it is blurry)

On another note though...... Look what I woke up to this morning. A spring snow storm! Not really a storm but still. We rarely get any significant snow fall. We also had an unusually mild winter this year. Now for it to even snow on April 7th?? And On my LID???? Last week we had a day in the low 80's and I actually broke down and had my air on for a day. (only a day but I have had my windows open since then) Last night I closed my windows, turned my heat back on, and used my gas logs. Tonight it is for forcasted to drop into the 20's. Crazy times.

It was pretty though :)

My car covered around 6:30 Am this morning.

All in all we got around a half to 1 inch accumulation. Areas to the north and West got around 3 inches. It was all gone by the time I got home tonight though as a result of temperatures in the 40's.

I Believe

With the grim rumors and projections about referrals currently circling today, I decided to do a post on faith and belief. I googled the word believe to look for an inspiring image to go along with my post. I swear (honestly) this adorable little girl is one of the images that popped up with my search. I am a firm believer in signs and am taking this image as a sign meant for me and all of us. We can't give up! Our children are out there and WE WILL find each other. I believe it

Knowing this doesn't make the wait any easier though. None of us planned to wait this long. The lack of information and uncertainty has been excruciating. The sleepless nights, altered plans, and pounds that I have gained have also not been pleasant. Do I regret my decision? Not for a minute! This picture of this adorable little girl (I wish I knew who she belonged to) has just affirmed my faith. I do and will continue to believe for me, for Abby, and for all of us.

My new header

A big thank's to Sara for the beautiful header she made for me and added to my blog. She is another waiting China Mamma. She doesn't charge a fee but there is a place on her site for you to make donations if you would like. She does wonderful work! Go here if you would like to check out some of her creations. Thank's again Sara :)

Referrals?

Referrals that were rumored to be on the way did not arrive as expected. Possibly next week they say? What I want to know is did they skip a month? I know that up to 35 days or so can pass in between referrals at times. Now I'm thinking that end March expected referrals would be 1 month and end April referrals would be 2 months...... So does early April referrals equal 1 month then early May referrals another month????? Seems like a lost month to me. Rumors are also saying that when the referrals do arrive they may still only be for the rest of October???? Then November is projected to be a huge month possibly taking as many as 4 months to get through all those referrals?????? So where I was thinking possibly June for Abby's referral is now starting to look like September. See why I'm going nuts here?

Made with love by Meema

Here it is. Abby's first Taggy Blanket. Meema made this for Abby. She did a great job and I love it! This is definitely coming with me to China. I will give it to Abby on Gotcha day!

Am I yelling?

Today while scanning the rumors on RQ I read that someone had been flamed for typing her posts in capital letters. Evidently this is a cyber no no and seen a yelling. The poster didn't think she was yelling just excited. She also posted that she preferred to type in caps. Some one else posted to her that while they knew she was not actually yelling they still had the thought that she might be in the back of their mind because of the caps. I say what ever floats your boat. As long as what you post is not spiteful or mean I would just consider it using bigger print.

Tonight while looking at my blog I noticed my print/font style is a lot bigger then anybody else uses on their blogs. I hope nobody considers me to be yelling at them with every post? Honestly I am not. I thought it was just easier to read this way. I know it is for me but I am also in denial that I probably really need at least some reading glasses. Also Bamma (my grandmother) prefers bigger print too. It's easier for her to read as well. But now I worry. Unfortunately that's what I am a worrier.

Now that I have gone back and read this post I am really thinking that it's kind of stupid. I'm tired so I am rambling a little, however, at least I am not stressing over referrals. Anyhow I think I am going to shrink my print down some.

Referrals maybe?

Rumor has it that referrals are on the way! Or are they? The RQ forum has seven pages of comments so far. On the first several pages things are looking good. By page 6 or 7 things begin to sound less certain. Hopefully by tomorrow some more concrete rumors will appear.


I just want to know the cut off date for this round. If referrals go into November ( and it's rumored they might) then maybe I might see Abby's referral in July instead of August). That will have been 19 months that I have officially waited. It's going to be a long weekend.

Darn it!

Not one of my better days that's for sure. I'm still trying to hang that D@#* shelf. Today I actually had it hanging on the wall. Then I started putting things on it. You guessed it! The whole thing fell of the friggen wall! I am so irritated right now. The wall of course looks horrible too. Oh and I really don't recommend trying to hang a shelf in the first place when you have PMS.

On the bright side though, at least it fell when Abby was not in the room. Now I am seriously considering getting a handyman.....


UPDATE : I hung the shelf again!

I'm not sure what happened. When I finally cooled down enough to go inspect the damage, the wall hooks were all in place and so were the brackets on the back of the shelf. HMMMMM??? There are a couple of dings on the wall that you can't see in the picture. It will be easy to touch those up though. So it's back up again and loaded up as you can see. Stay tuned to see if it makes it through the night. Luckily nothing up there is breakable.

Then Meema came over with additional hardware for hanging the shelf. I didn't use it yet. I will though if/when the shelf falls down again. Thank you Meema for doing that for me! Especially after I was grouchy with you when telling you that the shelf fell down. I'm sorry. LOVE YA :)

New Look

I have wanted a new look for my blog for a while. Today I started playing with it and got this. I will keep playing around with this new blogger format. It is definitely easier then the old one but I haven't been able to figure out everything yet. I'm stuck with the screwdriver wrench symbols on the left by my links though. Am I the only one that can see them or do you all see them too? If you do see them does any one know how to get rid of them??

Happy Birthday Jack

My nephew Jack just recently turned three years old. He is just a bundle of energy, all boy, and a lot of fun to be around. Check out his picture below.



I just knew he would love this Gel Ant Colony as a birthday present.

Check out this letter I received from Jack's mommy ( Abby's soon to be Aunt Kelly :D).

Sorry Aunt Kelly! Aunt Jenny thought this was a really cool gift :) By the way I could have gotten him this really cool remote control Tarantula instead. Do you think Zachary might want him for his birthday????

Ladybug Sighting

I have seen this little fellow popping up on other peoples blogs lately. Today I was lucky enough to receive this wonderful surprise in the mail myself! He is so cute and sitting front and center on my fridge right now.



This is what was written on the back of him.

So who do I thank???? Who ever you are I hope you are reading this. Thank you so very much for brightening my day :) I hope your day is just as bright and THANK YOU for thinking of me. I'll say it again. This journey is just so special made even more special by the neat people in this community that I just feel so honored to be a part of!

Another Nursery update

Sorry. Still no pictures to post of Abby's nursery yet. I am still waiting for my other curtain and hooks to arrive from target. I also have a shelf that I painted but now I can't figure out how to hang it. It doesn't have the usual holes on the back to hang it so I think I will have to use some brackets. It's times like this when I really wish I had a husband to help me.


Mean while where are all the rumors? Referral time is coming soon but there doesn't seem to be much of anything out there. I'm still trying to decide if I am better off with or without the Rumor Queen. I know she is back but the site just hasn't seemed the same since she has returned. I know it is probably healthier for me now that I am not experiencing the constant ups and downs that the rumors bring. At the same time though, the not knowing what to expect is pretty hard too........ Now that I think about it I think that I am better off not having any idea what to expect. That's what I think right now anyway.


Spring is here now too. A time of renewal and freshness. Also a reminder of what is soon to come. A new life and a new beginning! I am so excited to see what unfolds.......

Nursery Update

I have been working on Abby's nursery this week. I am so excited! It is really starting to come together and looks like a little girls room now. I have a few more things to do and then I will post some pictures :)

Today I was thinking about when my referral might come. I have been saying 5 more months but actually it could really be closer to 4 months. That would be by not counting the rest of this month and assuming that Abby's referral comes at the beginning of August. I know I am reaching here, but HEY! A girl can hope...... I just hope this feeling lasts. Normally my optimism is pretty short lived and rather quickly shot down by bad rumors.

Just for you Mary!

Happy 3 year gotcha anniversary day to Mary, Chris and beautiful Luke! If you check the last post, comment number 6 you will see buddy Mary's post. This happy family is currently enduring the wait again from Russia for a baby sister for Luke. I'm praying that you guys hear something SOON and this song is for you :)

Jammin to Disco!

Disco music always makes me happier. It's so bouncy and happy and fun to jump around to! I decided to add it to my blog during this slow time. Who knows? It can't hurt and I feel better all ready. I wonder how fast the CCAA would match if they had disco music playing in the backround ? :)

Special Gift

I work with many amazing people at work. That is one of the reasons I like my job so much. They have all been so excited and supportive of my journey to Abby. One particular person That I work with has really been on my mind. This person is not only a wonderful nurse but an excellent role model as well. After an extremely tragic last year in which she experienced several personal losses, she ended up loosing her very young daughter quite suddenly. Through out her losses she has remained very strong and positive. I don't know how she has managed to carry on but she does. She recently came back to work and we were all happy to have her back.


The other day she gave me this Willow figurine. She told me simply that she saw it and thought of me. I was overwhelmed when she gave it to me. I didn't cry then but am doing so now as I type this. How special that she, after all she has been through, can still take the time to think of me? I can only imagine the pain she must feel. I truly wish there was something I could do to relieve it from her.......

I really Love the Willow figurines. I have been collecting them as I have been experiencing my journey to Abby. They always make me feel better.


I ask now to everyone reading this. Please take a minute and say a prayer for my friend and her family. They need them. Thank You.......

Fun Buy's

I have been pretty good for a while now as far as not buying things for Abby. Truthfully there is not much left for me to buy her either because I have already bought it or I have been firmly instructed by the "peanut gallery" not too. While shopping at walmart these little bargains were just too cute to pass up. Boy I hope my baby has some hair. Either way though I will love her just the way she is!

These adorable finds again from Walmart just insisted they jump right into my cart. These paired up with the perfect Easter dress will look so pretty on my baby. Once I know her shoe size for sure I want to find pink or white patent leather shoes to match the purse :)

I love the rose on the purse.

And the little flower bows on the gloves. Oh I just can't wait!

Pig Surprise

Look what I just happened to find waiting for me on my doorstep the other night! A wonderful mystery surprise who just happened to arrive on my 15th LID anniversary. I love him. He is sitting on top of my TV right now brightening up my mood as I type. He is just too cute to put in Abby's room all by himself so for now he is hanging out with me.


Now for the mystery of who to thank? I had an idea but a couple other bloggy sisters helped me solve this mystery for sure. I wouldn't want to give you away :) but, please know that I SO appreciate your most sweet and thoughtful gift! It could not have come at a better time for me and is a great pick me up during this endless wait! This journey has just been so special to me! The connections that I have made along the way have and continue to amaze me! :) Sending hugs and a BIG thank you your way!!!!!

FIFTEEN

Today marks my 15 month Log In Date anniversary. At this point I'm kinda feeling like I'm in a standstill. The 6 month wait I was told to expect when I started this process (23 months ago) seems to be haunting me. Now It seems like with every new months referral batches that are issued I am left thinking yet again, "Okay 6 more months till I see my babies face". ... Big Sigh...........

Referrals Are Here!

My congratulations and best wishes to all of the lucky waiting families who received their referrals today! Referrals issued today were for those that had dossiers logged in with the CCAA from October 14th through October 24th. These families have been waiting around or close to 17 months. The CCAA continues to be very consistent taking 3 months to refer 1 months worth of dossiers logged in. I feel pretty confidant in predicting that I will receive Abby's referral in August. Crap! That light at the end of the tunnel just got a little dimmer.

This and That

I have been back from my Chicago trip since Monday evening. We had a blast and it was great being together with all of my buddies again. My wish for snow was granted in a big way! We saw plenty. It was beautiful! Buddy Molly (Thank you for being such a wonderful host this trip -ditto to Hubby Brian :D) was more then happy to oblige me telling me that she had been wearing her PJ's inside out in hopes of a snowfall for me. I am only posting 2 pictures of our trip. I am afraid that the others may haunt/incriminate me later. HEH. Any way we had a great time celebrating with the 2nd of our group (Welcome Robyn) to turn 40! Next year 3 more will join the club, wonder where we will go then? (next year I will be a member of the mom club as well getting to call and see how my baby is doing. That will probably be the only time I leave her next year.)



Cacey, Beth and I stuck at the airport in Norfolk. Our plane was delayed. There were 9 of us this trip. Shannon stayed home to study for a test. You were missed but we are glad you passed!!!

Me and Kelly making snow angels in the snow in Molly's driveway after we had all just gotten home from our Friday night city adventure. No body else was game but there was a little snow fighting event on Saturday night! No pictures but lets just say that we were all feeling it the next day. Just a little reminder that we are not as young as we used to be.

Moving on. I seem to have brought home the crud. I have been sick for 3 days. Yesterday morning I was up early and I swear I thought I was dieing! It prompted an emergency 6:30 AM phone call to Mom for some supplies. Thanks Mom!!! I am a little better today but I have a feeling this will be with me for a while. Unfortunately though, I have not lost my appetite. This leads to my next subject.

Time to really get serious about my weight. I figure I have at least 5 more months before I go to China. This will allow me time to loose the 2 chins noted in many of my Chicago pictures. (Thanks buddies for not pointing that out!) As I approach my 15th month of pregnancy (March 7th) it is time to absolutely get serious! As soon As I kick this crud I am going to become an exercising maniac. I think that has been my biggest problem. Wish me luck. Its also back to weight watchers again. If your still with me on this lengthy post, Has anyone tried the core plan? I have always done the points but I think maybe a change will be easier for me. You still count some points but there is a little more leeway with this plan. Anyone? I would love to know how the core verses counting points worked for you.

Finally Rumors are that referrals will arrive some time next week. I can't wait to see how far they get into October. Nothing seems definite yet. Is anyone else missing the Rumor Queen as much as me????????